Bat Wang

A lowest-common-denominator comedy about celebrity, jealousy and the dangers of vampire-genital contact.

A “Nick White” FILM
WRITTEN BY Nick White

In a world where mankind lives side-by-side with werewolves, vampires, zombies and swamp creatures, the only man the monsters fear is Stevie Carter.

And for good reason – with the help of his eight-foot tall robot bodyguard, the obnoxious high-school dropout presents and produces one of the most popular webshows on the internet – “Monsterprank” – a low-budget series in which Stevie plays childish slapstick tricks on supernatural creatures for the amusement of millions. And on Halloween night, despite the warning of his disdainful girlfriend, Stevie attempts his most dangerous prank yet – tea-bagging a vampire!

Filmed by his faithful robot, Stevie sneaks into the crypt of famous goth-rocker Count Stoker and gleefully lowers his balls onto the celebrity vampire’s sleeping face – but disaster strikes as the Count awakens - and bites Stevie’s favourite organ! Stevie narrowly escapes, and ties a tourniquet around the afflicted genitalia - stopping the vampire’s bite from spreading to the rest of his body. But his precious member is still affected…

Thus, Stevie Carter becomes host to the BAT-WANG - a jet-black two-foot-long winged penis with deadly fangs and a mind of its own!

With Stevie’s disgusted girlfriend refusing to help, he turns to the pastor at his local Church of Satan, and discovers that the only way to heal the Bat-Wang’s curse is to find and kill the vampire responsible. But to track down the jet-setting Count Stoker and penetrate the bizarre world of the supernatural rich and famous, Stevie must ask for the help of the monster community he’s spent years tormenting, while his robot buddy (also named Stevie) films him every step of the way.

Will the humiliated werewolves, sasquatches, swamp-monsters and zombies accept his apologies and give their assistance? Will Stevie convince his girlfriend to give the Bat-Wang a go? Will his new-found attraction to vampire women and the temptations of celebrity destroy their relationship? Or will Stevie’s gnashing, angry vampiric penis fulfil the pastor’s prophecy and bring about The Apocalypse?

See! The secret lair of the undead paparazzi!
See! A sasquatch stomping on a bag of flaming turds!
See! The disastrous effects of human urine on a swamp monster!
See! The erotic secret of the surf mummies!
See! The murderous wrath of a hairless werewolf!
See! A zombie make love to a chupacabra!
See! A two-foot-long vampire penis spew fire from its toothy urethra!
See! The disdain and contempt of a long-suffering girlfriend pushed to her limit!

BAT-WANG

A ninety-minute dick joke from the writer of “Death By Design” and “Ghostpuncher.”